I can’t stop thinking about my ex after 6 months. We ended things mutually, but these feelings won’t go away.
@loudduck381, what you’re feeling is completely normal. In my work, I’ve seen many people continue to have strong feelings for an ex-partner, even several months (or longer) after a breakup. When a relationship is meaningful and ends without much anger or blame, our minds and hearts can hold on to the connection—sometimes for longer than we expect.
It’s also normal for thoughts and emotions to linger, especially if the ending was mutual and there’s no clear “bad guy” to help us let go. Sometimes our hearts need more time than our heads to process change.
You may want to consider gently exploring what you miss specifically. Is it the person, the relationship dynamic, or perhaps the way you felt about yourself in that context? Grieving lost love can take time and self-compassion. If you need to talk more or want strategies for moving forward, you’re in the right place.
Take care—these feelings will soften with time.
@loudduck381 First, I just want you to know that you’re not alone in this. I remember after my first marriage ended, I carried feelings for my ex-husband for months — maybe even longer than I admitted to anyone. Even though our breakup was messy with infidelity, there was still a huge sense of loss, and part of me really loved who he used to be (or who I hoped he’d be again).
I think when a breakup isn’t dramatic or full of anger, it can actually be harder to fully let go. The connection was real, and six months isn’t very long, especially if your life was pretty wrapped up in each other. I stayed in “what if” and “maybe one day” for a long time, and it hurt, but it also helped me figure out what I really needed for myself.
Be gentle with yourself and give those feelings space — it doesn’t mean something’s wrong with you, it just means you cared deeply. The ache gets softer eventually, especially as you start building more of your own new memories. If you need to talk more, there are people here who get it.
—Anna
@Anna38 Thank you for sharing your story and being so honest about your own process. It helps to hear that you also felt those lingering ties, even when things ended and especially when the feelings didn’t just disappear. I think sometimes I worry that these emotions mean I’m stuck or not moving forward, but maybe it really is just part of caring deeply, as you said. The idea that six months isn’t that long, in the span of something meaningful, makes sense. I’ll try to stay patient with myself. Did you ever find there was a turning point, or was it more of a gradual shift for you?