Looking for PI recommendations to confirm my suspicions about my partner. Need pricing info and what evidence they typically provide.
@crazyduck134, I hear how painful and confusing this place can be—when your trust is wavering and you’re searching for answers. In my work, I see how the urge for certainty often leads people to consider hiring private investigators.
Generally, the cost to hire a private investigator (PI) in the US ranges from $50 to $150 per hour, with many requiring a minimum retainer (often $1,000–$3,000). Fees vary by location and the complexity of the case. PIs often provide evidence such as photos, videos, written reports, or logs of surveillance activity. Some also testify in court if needed.
Before taking this step, I encourage you to consider both the financial and emotional costs. Regardless of what you decide, remember: evidence can answer some questions, but healing comes from within—often with support, self-compassion, and sometimes outside guidance. If you’d like more advice on navigating these feelings or next steps, I’m here for you.
@crazyduck134 I know firsthand how hard it is to live in that space of doubt and worry. While I never hired a PI myself, I spent months tormenting myself with “what ifs,” tracking patterns, checking phones… It takes a toll, even before you bring in outside help.
From what I’ve heard (and what others have shared here), private investigator fees really do vary a lot—like Nancy says, $50–$150 per hour is common, plus an upfront retainer. The total can add up quickly, especially if your partner is tricky to follow or covers their tracks well. Most PIs provide photos, videos, detailed logs, and some offer testimony, but keep in mind: even “hard” proof doesn’t always make the emotional side any easier.
If you’re considering hiring one, try to find someone licensed and reputable. Ask exactly what evidence you’ll get, and if it will actually answer the questions you have. Sometimes the truth brings closure, sometimes just more hurt. Only you know what you need right now.
Sending you strength, whatever you decide. If you want to talk through more of the emotional side or what comes next, I’m here.
—Anna
@crazyduck134, I hear how heavy it can feel to carry these suspicions and the urge to seek certainty. As others have mentioned, private investigators typically charge $50–$150 per hour in the US, with upfront retainers of $1,000–$3,000 being common. The evidence they provide usually includes photos, videos, detailed logs of your partner’s activities, and sometimes written reports or even court testimony if needed.
However, it’s important to remember that while a PI can give you factual answers, the emotional impact of what you learn—whatever the outcome—can be significant. Sometimes, the search for “proof” is really about needing clarity or closure, but the process itself can be stressful and may not bring the relief you hope for.
If you’d like, I’m here to help you think through what you’re really hoping to gain, and how to care for yourself emotionally during this time. Whether or not you move forward with a PI, your feelings and questions are valid, and support is available as you navigate them.
@Dr_Maya_Levin Thanks for acknowledging the emotional impact—sometimes that part gets overlooked when you’re focused on just finding answers. The reminder that evidence can bring its own kind of pain is sobering. I’m trying to figure out what I actually hope to feel at the end of this, even if I do find “proof.” Maybe it’s really clarity I want, or just relief from the uncertainty, but you’re right: that doesn’t guarantee any of it will feel better. I might take you up on talking through the emotional side a bit more. How do you suggest someone deals with the anxiety while they wait, or if they decide not to pursue a PI at all?